My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #911
“I told you Igor, dry clean only.”
(Winning caption: “I’m not a mad scientist, just a disappointed one.” – Rob Needham, Ann Arbor, Mich.)
EARB
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #910
“I’m moving you to the ukulele section.”
(Winning caption: “I hate ‘partly cloudy.’ ” – James Watson, Maplewood, Minn.)
Retirement finances
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #909
“I wish someone would appreciate me for my vitamin B6 content.”
(Winning caption: “It’s always ‘Do you want fries?’ and never ‘What do fries want?’ ” – Gabe Bosworth, Seattle, Wash.)
Bug/Feature
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #908
“A tropical island was not your best place to be stranded, Frosty.”
(Winning caption: “Next time a ship passes, let me do the waving.” – Bob Dawson, Victoria, B.C.)
Job Security
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #907
“I know we’re dealing with budget cuts, but I miss the marching band.”
(Winning caption: “When you play our results backward, it sounds like we are making a profit.” – Dave Robertson, Scottsdale, Ariz.)
Risk Aversion
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #906
“A wonderful sight, that Olympian.
Her team can score more than Americans.
She can score enough 10’s in a week at her peak
To win the gold medal yet again.”
(Winning caption: “They migrate to a new city every four years to do this.” – Paul Osincup, Bozeman, Mont.)
Sloped Roof
Crowdstrike
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #905
“I can’t do anything about vermin in a subway. Alvin Bragg would put me in prison.”
(Winning caption: “To be honest, all I can do is make a few hundred of them late for work.” – David Carter, Saratoga, Calif.)
Dating Approval Process
My loser entry: CartoonStock caption contest 07-2004
“Two thoughts diverged in my head, and I – I took the one I thought would get you into bed, and that made all the difference.”
“Sorry, was I mansplaining again? I should point out though, you used a salad fork whereas a dinner fork would have been more effective.”
“Well that escalated quickly.”
(Winning caption: Not yet posted.)
HR Hire
Happy Independence Day 2024
My loser entry: New Yorker caption contest #904
“Call him metric Tom Brady. That really gets his GOAT.”
(Winning caption: “The petting zoo said he was a keeper.” – Ralph Sullivan, South Bend, Ind.)
