“Oh, alright. We’ll stand at the curb and cheer as you go by.”

(Winning caption: “This all started with the Fancy Feast.”)

“I wonder what OJ will do next.”

(Winning caption: “Remember when I told you that the pizza here is famous?”)

“I miss the ballpark experience. Next, spill a beer on me,
then I’ll go stand in line for the bathroom.”

(Winning caption: “Should we try that new place in the corner?”)

“It’s not a hive mentality. It’s a state of beeing.”

(Winning caption: “Just go. I’ll only end up hurting you.”)

“Sooner or later they’ll figure out we don’t really have cookies.”

(Winning caption: “We sue at dawn.”)

“Grilled nauga can be a bit rich, but the ledger stuffing should balance it out.”

(Winning Caption: “It’s never done.”)

“Proposition 3.2 approved medical can-a-buds.”

(Winning Caption: “I was just transferred to the fraternity ward.”)

“Yep, one is a little swollen. Should I be concerned?”

(Winning Caption: “Put it down slowly—the mothers are very protective of their young.”)

“Order for Ishmael is ready.”

(Winning Caption: “Complain all you want, but I haven’t lost a bathroom key yet.”)

“Had to be done. The microphone leans right.”

(Winning entry: “Prof. Smith’s re-enactment of his Weather Underground days
is much more interesting than his Powerpoints.”)

“I warned you not to tweet so much.”

(Winning caption: “Shall I keep reading?”)

“I’m from the oversight committee.”

The other finalists:

“Carry on. I’ll just be a fly on the wall.”
Submitted by Jake Hays, New York, N.Y.

“Mind if I jump in?”
Submitted by Daniel Ballen, New York, N.Y.

(Winning caption: “Mind if I jump in?”)

Contest #404

The broken image was eventually fixed. My caption would have been …

“The knotty aftertaste is captivating.”

(Winning caption: “So when are you two taking the plunge?”)

“Because you gave me blanket authority.”

(Winning caption: “Like I’m the first person who’s tried sleeping their way to the top.”)

“The legendary white tail.”

(Winning caption: “He calls it Ishmeow.”)

“This diagnosis, should you choose to accept it …”

(Winning caption: “Your insurance company got back to us.”)

 

“Wise guys. They’ll fix the mole problem.”

(Winning caption: “Hire the one that said, ‘Whom.’ “)

“I know we needed an excuse to shred the files, but after the audit I want my desk back.”

(Winning caption: “Honey, is the Tesla recharged yet?”)

“I’m sorry, I haven’t seen Nemo.”

(Winning caption: “But where would we raise the kids?”)

“Can you hear me now?”

(Winning caption: “I’ll let go of the stick when you let go of the stick.”)