“I know we needed an excuse to shred the files, but after the audit I want my desk back.”

(Winning caption: “Honey, is the Tesla recharged yet?”)

“I’m sorry, I haven’t seen Nemo.”

(Winning caption: “But where would we raise the kids?”)

“Can you hear me now?”

(Winning caption: “I’ll let go of the stick when you let go of the stick.”)

 

“Is his club bigger than mine?”

(Winning caption: “Getting past the guard is easy. How do we remove the paintings?”)

“Only happens when we smuggle performance enhancing drugs.”

(Winning caption: “I can’t believe my eye!”)

“Johnny is still a baby. Do not send him to school.
Johnny is still a baby. Do not send him to school …”

(Winning caption: “No, you grow up.”)

“I found it by the levee.”

(Winning caption: “I’ll be damned.”)

“OK, I’ll buy organic next time.”

(Winning caption: “We had meth on Tuesday.”)

“So that’s what happened to her. But where’s the white pantsuit?”

(Winning caption: “The doctor said it might help me quit.”)

“These days people have short attention spans. We only have happy minute now.”

(Winning caption: “You were with Ringling Brothers? I was with Lehman Brothers.”)

“She’s a sore loser but she plays an impressive trump card.”

(Winning caption: “Maybe his second week will go better.”)

“You just had to save a few bucks on the GPS.”

(Winning caption: “Long time no sea.”)

“For the last time, we must unite on this or be overwhelmed by divisiveness.
The correct term is Tsunami.”

(Winning caption: “Row v. Wave”)

“Take a chair. Really, take several.”

(Winning caption: “Where do you see yourself five chairs from now?”)

“Let’s call it a tie.”

(Winning caption: “I admire your restraint.”)

“No, I’m more of a Giants fan.”

(Winning caption: “Sir, I just need you to take one small step out of the vehicle.”)

“The baton doubles as a divining rod.”

(Winning caption: “Like the pomp. Not crazy about the circumstances.”)

“It’s a deal. You bring help and we promise to get you an audition.”

(Winning caption: “I knew they were smart. I didn’t know they were sarcastic.”)

“We’re branching out into stem cell research.”

(Winning caption: “It’s amazing to think he started out in the lobby.”)

“I have the same thing on my mind.”

(Winning caption: “I’ll have my guy call your guy.”)