Password

Posted on 2016-11-12 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Your password must include at least eight characters and one capital. | MickyMinniePlutoGoofyDonaldDaisyBambiThumperAlbany

Target

Posted on 2016-11-05 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Nonsense. What makes you think I'm out to get you? Wear this target, by the way.

Mother

Posted on 2016-10-29 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Dan takes credit for everything I do. | Same here. He's planning to become a mother soon.

Feedback

Posted on 2016-10-22 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

What do you mean I never give you positive feedback? Every time I forget to criticize you that counts as a compliment.

Productivity

Posted on 2016-10-15 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Liz, I read that productivity increases if I pay attention to the human, personal side of employees. I'll start as soon as you get naked.

Option

Posted on 2016-10-08 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Shorten the project by six months. And remember failure is not an option| Later ... It turns out failure doesn't much care if you consider it an option.

Font

Posted on 2016-10-01 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Yes, I can see you changed the font. That's not what I meant when I said I don't like the look of these numbers.

Status

Posted on 2016-09-24 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

How is your project doing? | It's a disaster. | How is your project doing? | Fine.

Data

Posted on 2016-09-17 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

The only way to show the result you insisted on was to fake the data. | I didn't know data could be real.

Plan

Posted on 2016-09-10 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Tommy, you need to develop a detailed project plan. | I already completed that project. | Great! All we need now is the plan.

Pokémon Go

Posted on 2016-09-03 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Memo to all staff: There will be no playing Pokémon Go during work hours. | I can't believe I had to interrupt my fantasy football draft for that.

Hyphen

Posted on 2016-08-27 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Add a hyphen to "micromanage".

Nice Day

Posted on 2016-08-20 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Yes Lisa, it is a nice day. Thanks for noticing.

Credit

Posted on 2016-08-13 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

This is great work Liz! Just put in my name instead of yours as "author" and it will be perfect.

Prioritize

Posted on 2016-08-06 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Let me help you prioritize: Make a list of all my demands, even the ones I haven't told you. Make them all priority #1. Then do them all at once. If you fail you are worthless and weak.

Mixed message

Posted on 2016-07-30 by Kenny — No Comments ↓

Lisa, my expectation is for you to show more initiative, be more self-reliant, and take greater personal responsibility. But always check with me first.